The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others

It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help

If you think nobody cares your alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

Some days you are the windshield, some days the bug.

Good judgement comes from bad experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgement.

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.

Duct tape is like the Force -- It has a light side and a dark side and it holds the universe together.

There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your mouth is moving.

Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it..

Never miss a good chance to shut up.